Her Name Was Jenny And Her Breath Was Fishy!

Here I am, back in Brooklyn! It's a gloomy day and for the first time this winter, I felt cold in my warm jacket. Barely 48 hours have passed since I came home, but I could swear that my tan is already fading. The roar of the ocean has been replaced by the roar of city traffic. New York City can erase the effect of a whole week of relaxation within hours.
Mexico was wonderful. I had a great time with my daughter C. She is a great travel companion. We laughed a lot and were both proud of ourselves for not shying away from new adventures.
One of the wildest things we did, you guessed it, was to go swimming with sea lions. I was never so scared in my life. These things are huge! We were the only two crazies who had signed up. So here we were, just C., me and the trainer, in a pool filled with salt water. Into the pool jumped a gigantic sea lion and started swimming circles around us. It was a female named Jenny. I was panic stricken, especially since the circles became smaller and smaller until I could feel the animal brush up against my legs. A group of tourists had gathered around the pool to see the "show". It was clear that the crowd at first mistook us for professional sea lion handlers.
Prompted by her real trainer, Jenny zoomed through the water, jumped into the air, over our linked arms. Then she had to hug first C. then me by wrapping her flippers around us. As a reward she got two or three fish. Then it was time for the sea lion to kiss us on the cheek. I could see a row of large brown teeth in her mouth. I almost fainted from the strong fish odor coming from Jenny's mouth. She stuck out a fleshy pink tongue. If the crowd initially thought that we were professionals, it was at this moment that they realized that C and I were just some deranged tourists, crazy enough to sign up for such an activity. Because I must have had a look of sheer terror on my face. I hope that some of the crowd's applause was ment for us and not just for Jenny. Because I think we put on quite a show for the spectators.
Once the demonstration was over and I was back on terra ferma, I was glad that we had the chance to get so close to such an amazing creature. Because sea lions are incredible. As the crowd dispersed, a young man walked past us, flashed a huge grin and told C. : " Just imagine! You were kissed in Cancun! And your mother approved!"
Yup, it was quite an adventure to share between mother and daughter.

Read More

Mexico!

When I booked our flight to Cancun, I wanted to escape the January cold here in New York City. Silly me. Here in Brooklyn, it is 70 degrees outside today, the sun is shining and people are sitting in sidewalk cafés. This is unreal, and pretty unsettling. The daffodils are pocking their heads out and my camelia is ready to bloom.
Anyway, I am all packed for tomorrow morning's departure. My husband is armed with an instruction manual on our son. It feels weird leaving them behind. But they will be fine. They are probably happy to have a few days of me not nagging them. Isn't that right, boys? ( just testing to see if you two read my blog) More next week.....

Read More

Help!

I hate to admit it, but after 23 years of city living, I consider mice, roaches and squirrels wildlife. So it will be quite a stretch for me to go swimming with seals during my upcoming trip to Cancun. I had agreed to the "dolphin encounter" but when C. researched the internet for things to do during our mother-daughter adventure, she stumbled on information about " Water Fun With Seals". My fate was sealed, so to speak. I am getting nervous. I know that seals are cute. I love watching them swim around and bask in the sun. But I really am missing the gene that makes me want to get into a pool with them. With my luck, I will be next week's newspaper headline. "Tourist dragged under water by trained seal in Cancun! Trainers are at a lose about savage nature of attack. Doctors try to reattach severed leg!" Maybe a bit overdramatic, but hey, I have seen the headlines about similar attacks. Just recently, a trained killer whale dragged his trainer into the depth of the pool and almost killed him, and that was his trainer. The seals in the pool in Cancun won't even know me.
I have been told that I need to go snorkeling during this trip. I am willing to try, but I guarantee you that I will experience the same emotions as Jerry Seinfeld who wrote that while he was underwater with tropical fish, he was so scared that he told himself over and over again : 'There is a fish, there is a rock. Who cares! Don't die, don't die, don't die."
But I promise you, I will try. I will risk being ripped to pieces by seals in a pool and encountering killer sharks while snorkeling. I will be brave, and with any luck, I will be able to report on the experience upon my return. Au revoir!

Read More

Keep your Eyes On The Road At All Times!

Daughter C. has her road test tomorrow morning! As I am writing this, she is out on the streets of Brooklyn with her father one last time to practice. I feel bad for her. New Yorkers are very impatient and erratic on the road. They are not too tolerant of slow drivers.
Learning how to drive in New York City means that you have to parallel park without hesitation. If you don't make it into a ridiculous small space, you automatically fail the road test. Not only do you have to look out for other cars on the road, you have to watch for pedestrians who can dash in front of the vehicle at any moment. Taxis weave in and out of your lane without warning. And then there are the potholes....you have to watch out for those as well.
Is C. ready for her license? You better not ask me. I am her mother. If it were up to me, she would still hold my hand while crossing the street. Well, I am exaggerating slightly, but not by much. The truth is, here in the city, a car is not a necessity. So even if she passes tomorrow, she will probably not do too much driving. The subway takes you everywhere you want to go. And that is just fine by me.

Read More

Be Afraid! Be Very Afraid!

Evangelist Pat Robertson got a message from God during a recent prayer meeting. It seems that in 2007, the United States will be under terrorist attack once more and will experience "mass killings." God wispered to Robertson that possibly millions of people will be affected. The attack will happen in fall "sometimes after September." The only uncertainty about the attack is what kind of tragedy will befall us. " The lord didn't say nuclear. But I do believe, it will be something like that."
The good news , I guess, is that Pat and God gave us advance notice. This provides us with plenty of time to get our affairs in order. Too bad for the terrorists though. I guess they lost the element of surprise which normally accompanies a terror attack.
But I am afraid, very afraid. Not of nuclear attacks which may or may not happen, but of religion. And of the fact that CNN and the Associated Press thought it necessary to cover Pat's ramblings. Since when do religious doomsday predictions become newsworthy? (http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/01/02/robertson.predictions.ap/index.html)
Religious nutters like Pat Robertson scare me more than the uncertainty of the future. I am reading " The End Of Faith:Religion, Terror, and the Future Of Reason" By Sam Harris at the moment. I highly recommend it. Harris warns that religion is nothing but primitive superstition and condemns it as a threat to human survival. Harris argues that the great modern religions belong on "the scrap heap of mythology," and his zero-tolerance policy applies to religious fundamentalists and moderates alike. It is a timely book, it is a very courageous book.
So before getting all worked up about Pat's "end of this world as we know it" prediction, before running out to stock up on canned goods and gas masks, get Sam Harris's book. And regain some sanity.

Read More

Where in the World is Cancun?

Sorry, but I just need to vent for a second. I am constantly amazed by the stupidity of some people. Case in point:
I just called T-Mobile to make sure that my international cell phone service is still active. I am leaving on Saturday with my 19-year old daughter for a week of rest and relaxation. After typing in my cell phone number to identify myself as a customer, I was connected to a very nice young lady. Cheerfully she wanted to know how she could help me and asked for my cell phone number again. ( I always wonder why I need to type it into the phone pad just to be asked again by the human on the other end.)
I explained that I needed to use my mobile in Cancun and just wanted to confirm that my account still permitted me to call internationally. No, problem," she replied and started to chit chat about how lucky I was and was this a vacation?"
"No, its a business trip" I lied. I just wanted to keep it short.
She seemed to be busy accessing something on the computer on her end. Then she giggled nervously:
"I am sorry, but could you tell me where Cancun is?"
I could not believe it. "You mean in what country?" I asked. "It's in Mexico"
'"Oh, all right" she replied without a trace of embarrassment.
She confirmed that I was all set to go and wished me a good trip. She seemed really sweet. And dumb.
Now I could have understood if I had asked her to check if my phone service covered Doha or Mumbai . Even I would have had to think for one or two minutes in what country they are located. But Cancun? Is Mexico not neighboring the United States? Are young people in this country so ignorant of geography that they don't even know about places just next door? It truly blows my mind.

Read More

2007 The Year Of The Fruit Revolution

At 11:49 Pm last night, the first weight loss commercial was aired on television. Broadcasters could not even wait till midnight. It flashed on the screen just as I was enjoying a piece of Key Lime pie. It was sinfully good and I had no intention of starting my New Year's diet earlier than I had to.
But starting today, I promise, I will be good and eat well. Three out of four members in this family have sworn to eat more fruit and vegetables, less fat and sugar. The fourth and youngest member frankly looks pretty skinny and opted out.
But pardon me for asking! Have you eaten good fruit lately? Is it just me or does fruit not have taste anymore? Sure it looks perfect, but I venture to say that most of the produce has never seen sunlight and therefore did not ripen the way it should. Recently, G and I bought four perfect pears. They were stone hard, so we left them on the counter for a day. When we finally cut into the first one, it was entirely brown on the inside. Bingo for number 2,3 and 4. So we brought them back to Fairway, our gourmet supermarket and complained. We got our money back after half an hour of back and forth with the various managers, but now I have no confidence in their fruit. Because it was not jut the pears. I frankly should have brought back the bananas which went directly from greenish to brown without ever attaining a golden yellow. I should have also brought back the raspberries that had a green fuzz on the bottom layer of the little plastic container and the apples which were totally devoid of taste.
So on this first day of the new year, I am so willing to consume more vitamins and to loose weight. But second on my list of resolutions is to bring back tasteless sub-standart produce to my local store. Maybe the manager will get a hint. Won't you do the same? Maybe we can start a movement: Demanding fruit that tastes as delicious as when we were young. And lets loose those extra 10 pounds in style, I say!

*** Follow the attached link for a BBC article on the U.S. governments backing of cloned food and allowing it to be sold without labeling it as such. Yuck!***
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/6215541.stm

Read More